June 27: Notes from RockWall Cottage

How difficult could choosing a book cover possibly be?

I was looking off into space, considering the symbol for this next book. All my books have symbols on the front cover. I didn’t know that I was doing this until after Brave. The blue bicycle was part of the story; it seemed right to put it on the cover. Then it became the symbol. Then came the chair, the yellow typewriter, the pew, and . . .

I spent a lot of days holding my favorite coffee mugs before I realized I was holding the symbol for the next book—An Exhausted Faith: What If the Struggle Isn’t Spiritual?—because nothing says exhausted any better than saying, “I need another cup of coffee.”

I was working on different ideas involving two coffee cups, maybe two chairs, maybe a table, maybe a conversation over coffee, maybe a vase of flowers on the table to symbolize hope... when Canva dropped this cover image. Wait? What? The coffee mug is the symbol!

Where this went from there looks nothing like this, except for the mug, which doesn’t look like this either. But as I was considering why the coffee mug was the symbol, I thought of all the healing conversations I have had with friends over cups of coffee. I also thought of the many days when I felt so alone in my healing, and my coffee mug warmed me like a hug from those who now lived states away. All of these felt like valid reasons to put a coffee mug on the cover. It also made sense because it was my go-to for the level of exhaustion I felt as I did my best to live the life I was given. As I was explaining this to someone, I said the following:

My cup of coffee never told me that my exhaustion was a spiritual problem.

I remember a time in my forties when I collapsed. Now I understand that this is common for survivors of childhood abuse. I tell this story in A Brave Life and repeat it in Trauma in the Pews. I had just enough energy to care for my family and work full-time (kind of), buy not to also serve in several capacities at church. I began to resign and couldn’t always show up for church. It looked like a spiritual problem. It wasn’t. And the coffee I was drinking all day long never judged me.

My sister-in-law Kay, a graphic designer who worked for Me and My Big Ideas (MAMBI) for many years, has created all my book covers. She has also created many covers for other authors through my publisher, Berry Powell Press. She gets me, loves me, shared her home while Scott was recovering, and is so very patient as I try to express what I want the covers of my books to be. The few who have seen this work in progress are spellbound by it—”It is so comforting!”

Hopefully, I will be able to share the cover very soon! It is worth the wait.

Stay tuned as I continue to share aspects of the book this week. Can I stay on schedule with my posts and also be obsessed by this book? I believe I can. An Exhausted Faith is so much more than I planned, expected, or hoped it could be.

I need to give a nod to the tea drinkers here. Not everyone enjoys coffee more than tea. While tea is often caffeinated, drinking a cup of tea usually suggests relaxing, not being energized. So, coffee was definitely the choice.