Sometimes Brave Survivors posts arrive on Sunday!
October arrives this week. That means that nine out of twelve months of 2025 are behind us. What a year it has been, both personally and on the national stage. I haven’t counted the days I lived out of a suitcase, but it was at least four of those nine months. That would be amazing if it had been because I was on an epic travel adventure, but it wasn’t. It was a hero’s journey of working to save my husband’s life and somehow keep myself sane until we reached the other side of a liver transplant.
This morning, Scott brought me coffee in this mug. I love this mug even though the rim is rather thick and often causes me to dribble coffee down the front of me, usually when I am wearing white. As I held the mug and sipped away at my first cup of coffee, I realized that this mug was exactly how I remained sane.
When I began to drift about in the world with only my suitcase and backpack, I was thankful to access coffee in whatever container was available. Slowly, I began to miss my coffee mugs. I have quite a few, likely more than necessary, but most have a memory attached to them. Not having my mugs added to the feeling of being untethered. I decided I needed to get back home somehow and bring back one of my mugs.
When my son offered to drive me home to gather some things I needed, I put “coffee mug” on the list. When I got home and opened the cupboard, I knew this mug was the one. This mug is a rare one that I actually bought for myself. Maybe I connected it to self-care because of that. I am not sure, but the blue typewriter was to become my faithful companion that would ground me every morning.
What a journey this mug and I had together. We shared our morning time in hospital rooms, the hospitality house, and our relative’s home, where Scott convalesced after surgery. It is a very solid mug and weathered the travels quite well. And then, it came back home with me.
It is hard to explain how holding this mug in the morning kept my world from spinning despite my constantly changing circumstances. It wasn’t the first time I used an object to assist me in remaining grounded. Early in therapy, I purchased the ring below to honor my healing and have a symbolic representation of that healing that was always with me. For several years, twirling the ring on my finger was a common occurrence. As I healed and was better able to self-regulate, it slowly became a part of my life, much like the coffee mug.
I asked ChatGPT about objects being used as a form of therapeutic grounding:
Yes — that’s a recognized and effective grounding technique, especially in trauma-informed and somatic therapies. It’s sometimes called using a “transitional object” or a “tactile grounding tool.”
Here’s how it works:
Sensory grounding: The object provides a concrete sensation (smooth, rough, soft, heavy, cool, warm) that helps redirect attention from overwhelming thoughts or flashbacks to the present moment.
Symbolic meaning: The object can represent safety, support, or a positive memory. For example, a stone from a calming place, a gift from someone safe, or a symbolic charm.
Choice and control: Reaching for it when needed gives the person agency — an active step to self-soothe.
Consistency: Because it’s always in your pocket, it’s a reliable reminder that you can regulate when dysregulation starts.
This strategy is often suggested in:
Trauma recovery (PTSD, complex trauma)
Anxiety management
Mindfulness-based therapy
DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) and CBT grounding skills
Some therapists encourage clients to experiment with different textures (smooth stone, fabric swatch, worry bead, coin, small wooden object) to see what feels most calming.
Without even consciously thinking about the mug in this way, my subconscious knew what I needed. Self-care has become a way of life. It was no longer an add-on that I needed to remember. It had become a seamless part of my everyday choices. What a difference this has made!